Oh, I'm so hung over and I never even touched a drop. See, I can't get enough, this must be love.

I just needed to sort this all out. I wrote this, and couldn’t help but wonder what one might think of me after reading it.

I have a lot of secrets.  I am not a.. good girl that people, more, my family, perceive me to be. I find myself always wondering what they would think if they knew what I’m like.  I always want what I can’t have. I lust. I like sex.  I explain to girls how to give good blow jobs.  I like keeping guys hooked on. 
I’ll tell my best friend something I find extremely sexy, like having sex with a man twice my age and she gasps, “molly! You’re so dirty!” and I can’t help but smile.
Is this wrong? Is it wicked that I crave things that I know are wrong?  More, does it make me a bad person? I’d say no. My morals are in line.. For the most part. I suffer from a lack of self esteem, yes, but that’s from something entirely different. I’m not out there offering my body to different guys.  I don’t think I’m a bad person for it. I’d never go out and hook up with a married man.  I’d never mislead a guy with deceiving actions.
I can’t reveal this part to me to many people.  I’m just.. Full of secrets.  I’m full of desires and I guess I have no way to express them yet. 
I’m not a slut. Don’t get me wrong. Hell, I haven’t even had sex in a while.
I guess.. I just needed to get that out.
This is one of the many reasons I think they got my age wrong.

I’m not an awful person for thinking..feeling this way.. Right?

I'm never here as often as I used to be. I'm constantly busy.
I'm losing not as close to the people I met on here that I used to talk to on a daily basis.
and that makes me terribly sad.
so.
I guess I was just saying...
hey.











( p.s.
      i'll visit your blogs as soon as I get the chance. dun' be mad. )

My father will be back in surgery on May 8th.
He'll be back into work soon, pushing his body to it's limits everyday while fighting against MS.
I have my concerns. I have my fears.
but everything will be okay.
I find escapes when the thoughts become too uneasy or unsettling.



There's a place that I go,
That nobody knows.
Where the rivers flow,
And I call it home.
And there's no more lies,
And darkness is light.
And nobody cries,
there's only butterflies.
Take me away
A secret place
A sweet escape
Take me away..


everything will be okay..

 honestly,



I think that men who are tall with broad shoulders, have those nice tans, wear carhartt clothing, work boots, have those working hands, and drive trucks are seriously one of the sexiest things ever.



Ever.



ooh, orgasmic.


Why am I so drawn in by that?

It's friday night.
my weekly drive around in the Civic, my best friend in the seat next to me, finding ways to screw off night. does that even make any sense?
and for that reason, I don't have time to write.
I will soon. :)
hey, maybe you should go out and enjoy yourself as well.
see you around, pretty people.